Category: attitude

“IT’S NOT FAIR!”…

SHOFTIM — Children are perpetually concerned with fairness. “It’s not fair,” they cry when a sibling gets something they don’t. It’s a phrase they often use when there’s something not exactly to their liking. But “it’s not fair” can become something more mature as they grow older. It can become a concern for justice. It’s not fair, for example, can become it’s not right that a classmate is being teased on the playground, or can extend beyond their immediate environment to —it’s not right that a person has no place to sleep at night, or that a child has...

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FREE WILL & DISCIPLINE…

RE-EH — All parents try to discipline their children. They have different methods, but generally parents are trying to influence their children to be moral and to behave appropriately. Imposing any kind of discipline rests on the assumption that children have free will. They can choose what is good and reap rewards, or choose what is bad and suffer the consequences. In this week’s Torah portion, Re-eh, Moses tells his people: “See, I am setting before you today a blessing and a curse”. The people have a choice: they can obey the commandments and reap blessings, or they can fail to...

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THE TONE OF YOUR VOICE…

DEVARIM — All kids use sarcasm at a certain point in their lives. It can be light-hearted or disrespectful and mean-spirited. Parents are often at a loss as to how to respond to it. If you call your children on it, they often say, “I was only joking”. Sarcasm is a slippery behavior, often hard to pinpoint. This week’s Torah portion, Devarim, retells the story of the spies who traveled to the Promised Land and come back with a negative report to the Israelites camped in the desert. God is angry with them, not only for the negative things...

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IS IT FAIR?

PINCHAS — “It’s not fair” is a refrain we often hear from children. A child may be jealous of what a friend has or may think he or she should have been chosen for a position on a sports team. Although most of us eventually stop whining, deep down we do think in terms of what is fair. In this week’s Torah portion we meet Zelophehad, who died before the Jews arrived in the land of Israel. His four daughters were concerned that his portion of the land would be lost because he had no sons. They objected, saying...

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BALANCING OUR PASSIONS…

PINCHAS — Life is a series of choices that we make every day. Some choices don’t feel so important. A bagel versus cereal for breakfast probably won’t make much difference to us, but other choices definitively shape the direction of our lives and the impact we make on this world. Some of us are passionate about. The weighty choices are often tied to the things that we are most passionate about and the most invested in, which also makes them the choices in which we stand to lose the most. So it is no surprise that, when we find...

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